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Jokes about the different military branches are as old as the military. Check out below for the top 16 marine jokes!
#16 – 10. Marine Jokes
16. What has 82 legs and an I.Q. of 42 ? A. 40 Marines, plus their LT.
15. Three marines are walking through the woods and come across a set of tracks. the first marine says, “those are deer tracks.” second disagrees “them are elk tracks” the third disagrees with both of them”those are moose tracks” they were still arguing when the train hit them.
14. How do you say “helicopter”in the Marine Corps? Get goofy look on your face, point upward, and make unintelligible grunting noises.
13. How do you knock out a Marine while he is drinking water? A. Slam the toilet lid on his head.
12. How come Marines have little holes in their forehead? A. They try to train them to eat with a fork in Boot Camp.
11. How do you keep a Marine happy in his old age? A. Tell him a joke when he’s young.
10. During the Vietnam war, a Lieutenant asked a Marine why he was falling back during a really fierce battle. “Didn’t you hear me say that we’re outnumbered 4 to 1 ?” The Marine replied, “I got my four Sir.”
#9 – 1. Marine Jokes
9. What do you call a Marine with an open head wound? Ajar Head
8. Q: How do you kill a Marine? A: Throw some sand on railroad tracks and tell him to “Hit the Beach!”
7. What does U S M C stand for? Uncle Sams Misguided Children
6. In effort to control procurement costs, the Pentagon decides to standardize coffee cups across all the services. The only difference being the stenciling on the bottom: Army Version: “coffee cup” Navy Version: “Cup, Coffee” Air Force Version: “cup, beverage, hot, cold, Mod 4 Mark III X29523-14a” Marine Version: ” coffe cup: DRINK FROM OTHER END”
5. What Don’t You Say to a Marine?I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to join the Marine Corps.
4. Marine = Muscles Are Required, Intelligence Not Essential
3. I tried to get in the Marine Corps, but couldn’t pass the final exam………………….No matter how hard I tried I couldn’t fit my head in that jar.
2. Q: What is the primary mission of the Marines. A. To ensure the Army doesn’t get their feet wet.
1. What Do You Call a Marine with an IQ of 160? A platoon!
Ideas for the top 16 marine jokes were taken from the following sources.[1]Jokes 4 Us – Marine Joke[2]AR15 – Need some Marine joke[3]Ranker – The Best Military Jokes
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