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Milk is good for your bones. But did you know it is funny too? With that in mind, check out the top 54 milk jokes.
Table of Contents
#54 – 50. Milk Jokes
54. Q: What did the boy say when his brother stole his chocolate milk. A: How dairy.
53. Worried that the milk I bought this morning has come from a cloned cow. It tasted exactly the same as a bottle I bought yesterday.
52. Q: How did the cow soccer team win the game? A: By milking the clock.
51. Guy spills milk on a me i say ” it’s OK we all make mistakes sometimes but apparently your mom made a big one
50. What is the worst part of milking a cow? The smell of the dairy air.
#49 – 40. Milk Jokes
49. Q: How did Reese eat her milk and cereal? A: Witherspoon.
48. Q: Do you know why the cow jumped over the moon? A: The farmer had cold hands.
47. A kid milks a cow and goes to school and tells his friends I milk a cow and it took awhile for it to warm up and his brother came over and said we don’t have cows we have Bulls
46. Q: What does an invisible man drink? A: Evaporated milk.
45. What do you get from a dwarf cow? Condensed milk
44. Walking down the street the other week, and someone threw some cheese and milk at me. I thought, “How dairy…”
43. Q: Where do milkshakes come from? A: Nervous cows.
42. Aunt: Stop telling the kids Santa isn’t real Me: Stop telling them their dad is going to get milk
41. Q: What is as big as a glass of milk but weighs nothing? A: It’s shadow.
40. Q: How do you make a milkshake? A: Give a cow a pogo stick.
#39 – 30. Milk Jokes
39. What’s the difference between America and a bottle of milk? – In 200 years the milk will have developed a culture.
38. You wanna know what i want for Christmas? My dad to come back with the milk he said he was gonna get.
37. Q: Why can’t dairy cows dance? A: They have 2 left feet.
36. Why didn’t the cows eat the lemon grass. It made sour milk.
35. Q: What do you call a cow that doesn’t give milk? A: A milk dud.
34. Q: What do you call a gallon of milk that comes to life? A: Frankenmilk.
33. Why don’t cows have any money? Because farmers milk them dry.
32. I had problems milking my cow one morning. It was an udder failure.
31. Q: Why did the farmer only raise brown cows? A: He loved chocolate milk!
30. Q: How easy is it to milk a cow? A: It’s a piece of steak.
#29 – 20. Milk Jokes
29. A man walks into a retro shop in Birmingham. He says “I’d like a kipper tie please”. Chap behind the counter says “milk & sugar?”
28. Q: What did one dairy cow say to another? A: Got milk?
27. Q: Why did the cow cross the road? A: To get to the udder side.
26. What do you get from a forgetful cow? Milk of Amnesia.
25. I bought a tin of evaporated milk. When I opened it, it was empty.
24. A man walks into a library and asks for a pint of milk. The librarian says “this is a library!”. The man whispers “sorry, a pint of milk please”.
23. Q: What did mama cow say to baby cow? A: It’s pasture bedtime.
22. A: What did they call Mickey after he had a milkshake? Q: Milky Mouse
21. I used to think the film Alien was about the traumas of making a cup of tea. “I can’t open this milk!” “In space, no one can. Here, use cream.”
20. Q: Why did the boy want a chocolate milk mustache? A: To look like Super Mario.
#19 – 10. Milk Jokes
19. Q: What kind of milk comes from a forgetful cow? A: Milk of Amnesia
18. Q: Why does a milking stool have only three legs? A: Because the cow has the udder.
17. A friend told me that they were bathing in milk, almost totally immersed. I said, “Pasteurised?”, they said, “no, just to my chin”.
16. Want to hear a joke a bout milk… no it’s to cheesey.
15. What kind of Bees make milk? BooBees
14. Q: Why did the kitten drink all the milk? A: Because kittens love milk!
13. Q: Why did the pirate want milk poured on him? A: He was Captain Crunch!
12. Q: What do you get from an Eskimo cow? A: Ice Cream
11. Q: Where did cavemen get their milk? A: From Wooly Cows.
10. Q: What was the cow’s favorite candy bar? A: Milky Way
#9 – 1. Milk Jokes
9. What’s the hardest part when making skimmed milk? throwing the cow across the lake
8. Q: What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck? A: Milk and Quackers!
7. Why does a milking stool only have 3 legs? – Because the cow has the udder.
6. Q: What kind of milk do you find in the dessert? A: Powdered milk
5. Why did Cleopatra bathe in milk? She couldn’t find a cow tall enough to have a shower.
4. A farmer walks up to his farmer neighbor with a jug of milk. the farmer says “I milked your cow”. the neighbor replies “i have a bull not a cow”
3. Where animal does Russian milk come from? moscows
2. Q: What happened when the milk was too cold? A: It got the milk shakes.
1. What do you call milk that gets everything she wants? spoiled milk
Ideas for the top 54 milk jokes come from the following sources.[1]worst jokes ever – milk joke[2]Puns and one liners – Milk Joke[3]Fun Kids Jokes – Milk Joke
References