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Elephants are big majestic creatures that almost don’t seem real. If fact, in some ways they almost seem like a joke. With that in mind, check out the top 101 funny elephant jokes.
Table of Contents
#101 – 90. Funny Elephant Jokes
101. Whats the difference between your mom and an African Elephant? Ten pounds.
100. Q: What was the elephant’s favorite sport? A: Squash
99. Why did the elephants start a stampede? Because the wanted to be herd.
98. Q: How many legs does an elephant have? A: Four, two in the front, two in the back.
97. Q: What’s more difficult than getting a pregnant elephant in a VW bug? A: Getting an elephant pregnant in a VW bug.
96. What do you call an elephant at the North Pole? Lost!
95. What do elephants and trees have in common? They both have big trunks!
94. Why can’t an elephant use a computer? He’s too afraid of the mouse.
93. Q: What time is it when an elephant sits on the fence? A: Time to fix the fence!
92. Q: Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? A: It thought it was a game.
91. Q: What is grey and not there. A: No elephants.
90. Q: Why are elephants so wrinkled? A: Did you ever try to iron one?
#89 – 80. Funny Elephant Jokes
89. Why did the elephant go in the mens restroom? To get some nuts
88. Q: Why do elephants paint their nuts red? A: So they can hide in cherry trees.
87. Q: Why do elephants never forget? A: Because nobody ever tells them anything.
86. What is an elephants favorite sport? Squash.
85. Q: What time is it when ten elephants are chasing you? A: Ten after one!
84. Q: What should you do to a blue elephant? A: Tell it funny jokes.
83. What grey, has a wand, huge wings and gives money to elephants? The tusk fairy!
82. Q: Why do elephants wear springs on their feet? A: So they can jump up in trees and rape monkeys.
81. How do you know when there is an elephant under your bed? When your nose touches the ceiling!
80. Q: What is the elephant’s favorite Star Wars character? A: TUSKan Raiders.
#79 – 70. Funny Elephant Jokes
79. Q: How do you shoot a red elephant? A: No, not with a red elephant gun. You strangle him until he turns blue, and then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
78. Q: Why are elephants wrinkled? A: Have you ever tried to iron one?
77. Q: What happens when elephants get lightheaded? A: They ele-faint.
76. Q: Why do elephants drink so much? A: To try to forget.
75. Q: Why did the Elephant stand on the marshmellow?
74. Q: What sound do monkeys hate most? A: Booooiiiiiinnnngggg…Booooiiiiiinnnngggg…Booooiiiiiinnnngggg…
73. Q: What’s grey and white on the inside and red on the outside? A: An inside out elephant.
72. Q: And why did the tree fall down? A: It thought it was an elephant.
71. Q: How does an elephant get down from a ladder? A: He can’t – you get down from a goose.
70. What has 3 tails, 4 trunks and 6 feet? An elephant with spare parts!
#69 – 60. Funny Elephant Jokes
69. Q: What wears glass slippers and weighs over 4,000 pounds? A: Cinderellephant
68. Q: How do you know if there are 2 elephants in your fridge? A: Two sets of footprints in the butter.
67. Q: Why did the elephant cross the road? A: Chicken’s day off.
66. Q: How does an elephant hide in the jungle? A: He paints his balls red and sits in a cherry tree
65. What did the elephant say to a naked man? Hey that’s cute but can you breath through it?
64. Q: Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead.
63. Why does the elephant bring toilet paper to the party? Because he is a party pooper.
62. Q: How do you get an elephant to sit on a cherry tree? A: Plant a seed and let the elephant stand on it.
61. Q: How does an elephant get down from a cherry tree? A: It doesn’t, it gets down from a duck.
60. Q: Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? A: It was glued to the first one.
#59 – 50. Funny Elephant Jokes
59. Q: How do you know if an elephant is standing next to you in an elevator? A: By the smell of peanuts on their breath.
58. Q: What do you do with a blue elephant? A: You try and cheer her up
57. Q: How do you get 4 elephants into a Volkswagon bug? A: 2 in the front and 2 in the back
56. Q: What’s the biggest drawback of the jungle? A: An elephant’s foreskin.
55. What do you call an elephant that doesn’t matter? An irrelephant.
54. Q: Why are elephants such bad dancers? A: Because they have 2 left feet.
53. Q: What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? A: Stuck.
52. What’s grey, stands in a river when it rains and doesn’t get wet? An elephant with an umbrella!
51. Q: How do you shoot a yellow elephant? A: Ever seen a yellow elephant?!!!
50. Q: Heard of the wallet made of elephant foreskin? A: When you rub it, it turns into a briefcase.
#49 – 40. Funny Elephant Jokes
49. Why did the elphant cross the road? because the chicken wanted a day off.
48. Q: What is gray and blue and very big? A: An elephant holding it’s breath!
47. Q: How do you get down from an elephant? A: You don’t, you get down from a duck.
46. I suppose when you’ve seen one lion catch an elephant, you’ve seen a maul.
45. Why don’t elephants use computers? A. Because they’re afraid of the mouse.
44. What is an elephants favorite rap song? I like big nuts, and I cannot lie.
43. Q: What’s the best thing to do if an elephant sneezes? A: Get out of its way!
42. Q: What’s weighs 2 tons, has big ears and makes toys for Santa? A: Elfants
41. What’s grey and moves at a hundred miles an hour? A jet propelled elephant!
40. Q: Where to do elephants like to sit when they travel? A: On the trunk.
#39 – 30. Funny Elephant Jokes
39. What’s big and grey and wears a mask? The elephantom of the opera!
38. Q: What did Tarzan say when the elephants charged? A: Look out – they’re coming right at us!
37. What do you call an elephant that flies? A jumbo jet!
36. Where does an elephant pack his luggage? In his trunk!
35. Q: How do you get an elephant into a VW? A: Open the car door, put the elephant inside, close the door.
34. Why does an elephant wear sneakers? So that he can sneak up on mice!
33. Q: How do you keep an elephant from charging? A: You take away its credit cards!
32. Q: Why did the elephant sit on the marshmallow? A: So he wouldn’t fall into the hot chocolate.
31. What do elephants do at night? A. Watch elevision.
30. What did the banana say to the elephant? A. Nothing – bananas can’t talk!
#29 – 20. Funny Elephant Jokes
29. Q: What do you call an elephant wearing pink earmuffs and a dress? A: Anything you want, it can’t hear you.
28. Q: How do you know if you pass an elephant? A: You can’t get the toilet seat down.
27. When should you feed milk to a baby elephant? When it’s a baby elephant!
26. Q: How do you shoot a green elephant? A: Tell him a dirty joke so he turns red, strangle him until he turns blue, and then shoot him with a blue elephant gun.
25. Q: What do you do when you see an elephant with a basketball? A: Get out of its way!
24. Q: How do you get an elephant out of a tree? A: Stand it on a leaf and wait ’till autumn (or wait for parachute practice.)
23. Why did the elephant cross the road? Because the chicken was having a day off!
22. Q: What was the elephant doing on the motorway? A: About 5 mph (8kph in the rest of the world)
21. Q: Why is an elephant big, grey, and wrinkly? A: Because, if it was small, white and smooth it would be an Aspirin.
20. What do you get when you mix an elephant with a rhino? Elephino.
#19 – 10. Funny Elephant Jokes
19. What do you get when you cross a potato with an elephant? Mashed potatoes!
18. What time is it when a elephant sits on a fence? Time to get a new fence.
17. Why were the elephants thrown out of the swimming pool? Because they couldn’t hold their trunks up!
16. Q: How do you put an elephant into a fridge? A: Open the VW door, take the elephant out, close the VW door, open the fridge, put the elephant inside, close the fridge.
15. Q: What time is it when an elephant stands on your skateboard? A: Time to get a new skateboard.
14. Q: What’s the difference between an eggplant and an elephant? A: If you don’t know, then I’m never asking you to get me any eggplant.
13. Q: What do you call an elephant with a machine gun? A: Sir.
12. What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed? Time to get a new bed!
11. What’s grey with red spots? A. An elephant with the measles.
10. Q: What’s grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow, grey, yellow? A: An elephant rolling down a hill with a daisy in its mouth!
#9 – 1. Funny Elephant Jokes
9. Q: What do you give a seasick elephant? A: A very big bag.
8. What do you call an elephant in a phone booth? Stuck!
7. What’s grey but turns red? An embarrassed elephant!
6. What do you get when you cross a Elephant with a garden? Squash!
5. Q: How do you shoot a blue elephant? A: With a blue elephant gun, of course.
4. Q: What would you do if an elephant sat in front of you at a movie? A: Miss most of the film.
3. Q: What’s grey and white on the inside and red and white on the outside? A: Campbell’s Cream of Elephant soup.
2. Q: What’s as big as an elephant, but weighs nothing? A: An elephant’s shadow.
1. Q: How do you know if there is an elephant in your fridge? A: Footprints in the butter.
Ideas for the top 101 funny elephant jokes were taken from the following sources.[1]Ducksters – Elephant Jokes[2]Jokes 4 Us – Elephant Jokes[3]Elephant Q-A Jokes[4]Funny Kids Jokes – Elephant Jokes for Kids
