Top 101 Technology Jokes

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Technology has become a big part of our society. It is everywhere even in jokes. Check out the top 101 technology jokes.

#101 – 90. Technology Jokes

101. Why do they call it the PS4? Because there are only 4 games worth playing!

100. What is an astronaut’s favorite place on a computer? The Space bar!

99. If you put a million monkeys on a million keyboards, one of them will eventually write a Java program. The rest of them will write Perl programs.

98. How do trees use a computer? They log in!

97. Q: Why did the computer show up at work late? A: It had a 
hard drive.

96. Why did the geek add body { padding-top: 1000px; } to his Facebook profile? He wanted to keep a low profile.

95. Why are PCs like air conditioners? They stop working properly if you open Windows!

94. Why did the developer go broke? Because he used up all his cache

93. Q: What did the computer do at lunchtime?A: Had a byte!

92. There are only two hard things in computer science: cache invalidation, naming things, and off-by-one errors.

91. What do you call 18-year olds using dating apps? Tinder Tots.

90. The guy who invented predictive text died last night. His funfair is next monkey.

#89 – 80. Technology Jokes

89. Did you know the Apple store now serves food? With your Big Mac you can get a side of Wi-fries.

88. What do you call 8 hobbits? A hobbyte

87. There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don’t.

86. Q: Why was the cell phone wearing glasses? A: It lost its contacts.

85. How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? None. It’s a hardware problem.

84. Why did Mark Zuckerberg visit Beijing, China? To see the “Great Firewall”.

83. How does a computer get drunk? A. It takes screenshots.

82. You know you’re texting too much when… …you’re happy when you get stopped at a red light.

81. Why do they call it hyper text? Too much JAVA.

80. Sometimes computers lag so much, it hertz!

#79 – 70. Technology Jokes

79. Remember when everyone had diaries and got mad when someone read them? Now they put everything on Facebook and get mad when they don’t!

78. Q: Why couldn’t the blonde add 10 + 5 on a calculator? A: She couldn’t find the “10” button.

77. Why should most electronic appliances not be shipped by air? Because they need to be grounded.

76. What do you call it when you have your mom’s mom on speed dial? A. Instagram.

75. You know you’re texting too much when… …you say LOL in real life, instead of just laughing.

74. Your momma is so stupid she put airbags on her computer in case it crashed.

73. What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? A. “I have read and agree to the Terms & Conditions.”

72. Have you heard of that new band “1023 Megabytes”? They’re pretty good, but they don’t have a gig just yet.

71. I decided to make my password “incorrect” because if I type it in wrong, my computer will remind me, “Your password is incorrect.”

70. PATIENT: Doctor, I need your help. I’m addicted to checking my Twitter! DOCTOR: I’m so sorry, I don’t follow.

#69 – 60. Technology Jokes

69. What do you call a country with slow internet speeds? America Online.

68. I named my hard drive “dat ass,” so once a month my computer asks if I want to “back dat ass up.”

67. An SEO expert walks into a bar, bars, pub, tavern, public house, Irish pub, drinks, beer, alcohol

66. Why did the PowerPoint Presentation cross the road? A. To get to the other slide.

65. Yo mamma is so fat that when she sat on a laptop, the hardware turned into software!

64. Teacher: “Where is your home work?” Student: “Please visit my home page or follow me in instagram.”

63. What do you call a woman you married off the internet? Wife-I.

62. Two bytes meet. The first byte asks, “Are you ill?” The second byte replies, “No, just feeling a bit off.”

61. What did the turkey say to the computer? Google, google, google!

60. I’ve always thought my neighbors were quite nice people…But then they put a password on their Wi-Fi!

#59 – 50. Technology Jokes

59. Why are iPhone chargers not called Apple Juice?!

58. What kind of party does a laptop go to? A CISCO party.

57. Me: Siri, where is the best place to hide a body?Siri: The second page of a Google search.

56. Why was the JavaScript developer sad? Because he didn’t Node how to Express himself

55. The guy who invented auto-correct for smart phones passed away today. Restaurant in peace.

54. I would tell you a UDP joke, but you might not get it.

53. Why did Jack and Jill “really” go up the hill? To get better Wi-fi.

52. What was the hipster doing at the computer? Looking in the recycling bin for something retro.

51. Autocorrect has become my worst enema.

50. 8 bytes walk into a bar, the bartenders asks “What will it be?” One of them says, “Make us a double.”

#49 – 40. Technology Jokes

49. Q: What’s Forrest Gump’s password? A: 1forrest1

48. Q: How can you tell if a blonde used a computer? A: There’s Wite-Out all over the screen.

47. Q: How easy is it to count in binary? A: It’s as easy as 01 10 11.

46. What do you call a ride sharing app that serves breakfast? Eggs Uber Easy.

45. What do you call a computer floating in the ocean? A Dell Rolling in the Deep.

44. What happens when a Buddhist becomes totally absorbed with the computer he is working with? He enters Nerdvana.

43. What kind of phone does an optometrist have? An “Eye Phone”!

42. The energizer bunny was arrested on a charge of battery.

41. Why should you never drill a hole in a clock? Because time will run out.

40. Whats 10 Blocks Long and has never had sex? The line for the new Call of Duty game.

#39 – 30. Technology Jokes

39. Mom: How make chicken. Daughter: What? Mom: Where buy chicken Daughter: Mom, this isn’t Google. Mom: Avocado

38. Mother: “Sweetie, make a Christmas wish.” Girl: “I wish that Santa will send some clothes to those naked girls in papa’s computer.”

37. I saw a driver texting and driving. It made me so mad I threw my beer at him.

36. A SEO couple had twins. For the first time they were happy with duplicate content.

35. If you spell Chuck Norris wrong on Google it doesn’t say, “Did you mean Chuck Norris?” It simply replies, “Run while you still have the chance.”

34. Why couldn’t Bill Gates get a mistress? Because he’s penis was MICROSOFT!

33. Q: What computer sings the best? A: A Dell.

32. Q: What do computers eat for a snack? A: Microchips!

31. Yo momma so fat when she registered for MySpace there was no space left.

30. I tried to say, “I’m a functional adult,” but my phone changed it to “fictional adult,” and I feel like that’s more accurate.

#29 – 20. Technology Jokes

29. Q: What do you call an iPhone that isn’t kidding around? A: Dead Siri-ous

28. Q: What did the spider do on the computer? A: Made a website!

27. Why do Java developers wear glasses? Because they can’t C#

26. Why is it that programmers always confuse Halloween with Christmas? Because 31 OCT = 25 DEC

25. What should you do after your Nintendo game ends in a tie? A. Ask for a Wii-match!

24. Anyone who thinks “talk is cheap”… obviously didn’t pay my daughter’s last mobile phone bill!

23. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was excellent.

22. How do you get a computer drunk? A Screenshot of Tequila.

21. How do you know you are using Linux? Your computer only has 4 modes: Abort, Retry, Fail and Reboot!

20. What would happen if two autonomous cars collided? How would they decide whose fault it was?

#19 – 10. Technology Jokes

19. Thanks to autocorrect, 1 in 5 children will be getting a visit from Satan this Christmas.

18. Why did the computer go to the dentist? Because it had Bluetooth.

17. Yo momma is so fat, when she sat on an iPod, she made the iPad!

16. What does an air conditioner have in common with a computer? They both lose efficiency as soon as you open windows.

15. My grandfather once told me my generation relied too much on technology, I screamed to him that his dos and unplugged his life support.

14. Q: Why shouldn’t Facebook have paid $1 billion dollars for Instagram? A: They could’ve downloaded it for free!

13. Person1: Aren’t we all internet explorers? Person2: You mean we run slow and no one likes us.

12. What do you call the space inbetween Pamela Anderson’s breasts? Silicon Valley.

11. Bill Gates walked into an APPLE store and farted but it was APPLE’S fault that they had no WINDOWS.

10. We’ll we’ll we’ll…if it isn’t autocorrect.

#9 – 1. Technology Jokes

9. What did the robot say to the dead robot? Rust-in-peace.

8. Do not be racist; be like Mario. He’s an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew!

7. You know you’re texting too much when… …you try to text, but you’re on a landline.

6. What do you call having your grandma on speed dial? Instagram.

5. A solar-powered computer wristwatch, which is programmed to tell the time and date for 125 years, comes with a guarantee — for two years.

4. What is written on Steve Jobs tombstone? iCame, iSaw, iConquered, iLeft, iCameBack, iThinkDifferent, iMac, iPod, iTunes, iPhone, iPad, iCloud, iRIP

3. They say the truth is out there…If that is the case…Does anyone know the URL?

2. I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. They told me I wasn’t putting in enough shifts.

1. What’s the difference between an Linux and a virus? A virus does something.

Ideas for the top 101 technology jokes were taken from the following sources.^[1]Laugh Factory – JOKE BANK – TECHNOLOGY JOKE^[2]Reader’s Digest – Computer Jokes^[3]UniJokes – The best technology joke^[4]TechRepublic – The geekiest tech jokes on the internet^[5]Jokes 4 Us – Technology Joke^[6]AJokeADay – Technology Joke