Top 104 Funny Cat Jokes
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Cats are a completely different type of pet than a dog. They kind of just do their own thing. For them, you are just there. Needless to say, they can make for quite the funny cat joke. Check out below for the top 104 funny cat jokes, that will have you rolling around laughing!
Table of Contents
#104 – 90. Funny Cat Jokes
104. Q: What has more lives than a cat? A: A frog because it croaks every night.
103. Q: What did the freshman computer science major say when he was told that the work stations had mice? A: Don’t you have a cat?
102. Q: What do you get when you cross an elephant with a cat? A: A big furry creature that purrs while it sits on your lap and squashes you.
101. Q: What do you call at cat that goes bowling? A: An alley cat
100. Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a sheep? A: A stripey sweater!
99. Q: What is a lion’s favorite food? A: Baked beings!
98. Q: Why are cats better than babies? A: Because you only have to change a litter box once a day.
97. Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a snowman? A: Frostbite!
96. Q: How do felines maintain law and order? A: Claw Enforcement.
95. Q: Why did the litter of communist kittens become capitalists? A: Because they finally opened their eyes.
94. Q: What do you call a cat that lives in an igloo? A: An eskimew!
93 Q: What looks like half a cat? A: The other half!
92. Q: What would a cat say if you stepped on its tail? A: “Me-OW!”
91. Q: What is a cat’s favorite book? A: The Great Catsby.
90. Q: Why did the cat wear a dress? A: She was feline fine.
#89 – 80. Funny Cat Jokes
89. Q: What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse? A: Kitty Perry
88. Q: Why did the judge dismiss the entire jury made up of cats? A: Because each of them was guilty of purrjury.
87. Q: What did the alien say to the cat? A: “Take me to your litter.”
86. Q: What is a cat’s favorite color? A: Purrrple
85. Q: There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left? A: None, because they were copycats!
84. Q: What is it called when a cat wins a dog show? A: A CAT-HAS-TROPHY!
83. Q: What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
82. Q: If a four-legged animal is a quadruped and a two-legged animal is a biped, What’s a tiger? A: A stri-ped!
81. Q: What do you call an alternative rock band fronted by felines? A: Death Cab for Kitty.
80. Q: Why was the cat sitting on the computer? A: To keep an eye on the mouse!
#79 – 70. Funny Cat Jokes
79. Q: What’s the difference between a cat and a comma? A: One has claws at the end of its paws, while the other is a pause at the end of a clause.
78. Q: Why do you always find the cat in the last place you look? A: Because you stop looking after you find it.
77. Q: Where does a cat go when it loses its tail? A: The retail store.
76. Q: Why are cats such good singers? A: Because they’re very mewsical.
75. Q: What is a cat’s favourite movie? A: “The Sound of Mewsic.”
74. Q: What do you get if you cross a chick with an alley cat? A: A peeping tom.
73. Q: What is the most breathless thing on television? A: The Pink Panter Show!
72. Q: What kind of sports car does a cat drive? A. A Furrari.
71. Q: Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water? A: He set a new lap record.
70. Q: What do cats use to make coffee? A: A purrcolator.
#69 – 60. Funny Cat Jokes
69. Q: Why is it so hard for a leopard to hide? A: Because he’s always spotted.
68. Q: What do you get if you cross a leopard with a watchdog? A: A terrified postman!
67. Q: Why is the cat so grouchy? A: Because he’s in a bad mewd.
66. Q: What do you call the cat that was caught by the police? A: The purrpatrator.
65. Q: What happened when the cat went to the flea circus? A: He stole the whole show!
64. Q: Why did a person with an unspayed female cat have to go to court? A: For kitty littering.
63. Q: What is a cat’s favourite car? A: The Catillac.
62. Q: How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? A: ‘Pleased to eat you.’!
61. Q: How did a cat take first prize at the bird show? A: He just jumped up to the cage, reached in, and took it.
60. Q: Why don’t cats play poker in the jungle? A: There are too many cheetahs.
#59 – 50. Funny Cat Jokes
59. Q: Why shouldn’t you kidnap the kitten, Keanu? A: Because curiousity killed the cat burglar.
58. Q: How do cats end a fight? A: They hiss and make up.
57. Q: What kind of cat will keep your grass short? A: A Lawn Meower.
56. Q: What do you call a flying cat? A: I’m-paws-sible.
55. Q: What do cats like on a hot day? A: Mice cream cones.
54. Q: Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of wool? A: She had mittens.
53. Q: Why is the desert lion everyone’s favorite at Christmas? A: Because he has sandy claws!
52. Q: Why did the cat put oil on the mouse? A: Because it squeaked.
51. Q: How many cats can you put into an empty box? A: Only one. After that, the box isn’t empty.
50. Q: What do you call a cat that gets anything it wants? A: Purrr-suasive.
#49 – 40. Funny Cat Jokes
49. Q: Who are cats going to vote for in November? A: Hillary Kitten.
48. Q: What do you get if you cross a cat with a bottle of vinegar? A: A sourpuss!
47. For a man to truly understand rejection… he must first be ignored by a cat.
46. Q: What’s the worst kind of cat? A: A cat-astrophe
45. Q: What is a cat’s favorite song? A: Three Blind Mice.
44. Q: What do you call a pile of kittens? A: A meowntain
43. Q: Why are cats so good at video games? A: Because they have nine lives!
42. Q: What is smarter than a talking cat? A: A spelling bee!
41. Q: What do you call a cat that wears make up? A: Glamourpuss.
40. Q: How do you get a wet pussy? A: Put it in the shower.
#39 – 30. Funny Cat Jokes
39. Q: If lights run on electricity and cars run on gas, what do cats run on? A: Their paws.
38. Q: What is the cat’s favorite TV show? A: The evening mews!
37. Q: Why did the cat sleep under the car? A: Because he wanted to wake up oily.
36. Q: What do cats like to eat for breakfast? A: Mice Krispies.
35. Q: What is a French cat’s favorite pudding? A: Chocolate mousse!
34. Q: What do you get if you cross a tiger with a kangeroo? A: A stripey jumper!
33. Q: What do you use to comb a cat? A: A catacomb.
32. Q: Wanna hear a bad cat joke? A: Just kitten!
31. Q: When is a lion not a lion? A: When he turns into his cage!
30. Q: What do you call a cat in a station wagon? A: A car-pet
#29 – 20. Funny Cat Jokes
29. Q: Why did the cat put the letter “M” into the fridge? A: Because it turns “ice” into “mice”!
28. Q: Where is one place that your cat can sit, but you can’t? A: Your lap.
27. Q: Is it bad luck if a black cat follows you? A: That depends on whether you’re a man or a mouse.
26. Q: What did the cat say when he lost his toys? A: You got to be kitten me.
25. Q: What side of the cat has the most fur? A: The OUT-side.
24. Q: What did the cat say when he lost all his money? A: I’m paw!
23. Q: What does a cat have that no other animal has? A. Kittens.
22. Q: How does the cat get its own way? A: With friendly purrsuasion.
21. Q: What is the cat’s favourite magazine? A: Good Mousekeeping.
20. Q: How do you know when your cat’s done cleaning herself? A. She’s smoking a cigarette.
#19 – 10. Funny Cat Jokes
19. Q: What’s striped and bouncy? A: A tiger on a pogo stick!
18. Q: What’s worse than raining cats and dogs? A: Hailing taxis
17. Q: What do you get when you take a Kitty Kat to the tailor? A: Bad Blood.
16. Q: What happened when the lion ate the comedian? A: He felt funny!
15. Q: What was the name of the film about a killer lion that swam underwater? A: ‘Claws.’
14. Q: What do you call newborn kittens who keep getting passed from owner to owner? A: Chain litter.
13. Q: What do you call a cat who just ate a duck? A: a duck-filled platy puss.
12. Q: What did the cat say when the mouse got away? A: You’ve got to be kitten me!
11. Q: What is a cat’s favourite subject in school? A: HISStory.
10. I had to get rid of my husband. He was allergic to my cat.
#9 – 1. Funny Cat Jokes
9. Q: What do tigers wear in bed? A: Stripey pyjamas!
8. Q: What is the name of the unauthorized autobiography of the cat? A: Hiss and Tell.
7. Q: How are tigers like sergeants in the army? A: They both wear stripes!
6. Q: If a cat can jump five feet high, then why can’t it jump through a three foot window? A: Because the window is closed.
5. Q: What did the lions say to his cubs when he taught them to hunt? A: ‘Don’t go over the road till you see the zebra crossing.’
4. Q: What’s happening when you hear “woof… splat… meow… splat?” A: It’s raining cats and dogs.
3. Q: What does a cat do when it gets mad? A: It has a hissy fit.
2. Q: Why did the cat run away from the tree? A: It was scared of its bark.
1. Q: Why don’t cats like online shopping? A: They prefer a cat-alogue.
Ideas for the top 101 funny cat jokes were taken from the following sources.[1]Reader’s Digest – Cat Joke[2]Jokes 4 Us – Cat Joke[3]Wide Open Pets – You’ve Got to Be Kitten Me with the 13 Best Cat Joke out There
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