Top 52 Brazil Jokes

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Brazil is the largest country in South America. With that in mind, check out the top 52 Brazil jokes.

#52 – 50. Brazil Jokes

52. Every single currency in this world is just an illusion, a social construct but Brazil’s real.

51. Did you hear about the Brazilian racist? He joined the que que que.

50. What do you call a Brazilian with a lowered car? Carlos!

#49 – 40. Brazil Jokes

49. What’s the difference between pick and choose? Pick means to select something and choose is what a Brazilian wears on his feet.

48. Trump was rushed to the hospital after learning that 3 Brazilians died from the Coronavirus Lying in the hospital bed his face still white with shock, he finally got the courage to ask shakily and in a quiet voice, “How many people is a brazillion?”

47. What is the cookie capitol of Brazil? Oreo di Janiero.

46. How many South Americans does it take to change a light bulb? A Brazillon.

45. I told my wife to get a Brazilian The next day she introduced me to her new friend, Paulo.

44. How many people live in South America? At least one Brazilian

43. Why wasn’t Jesus born in Brazil? He couldn’t find 3 wise men or a virgin.

42. What’s the difference between a smart Brazilian and a unicorn? Nothing, they’re both fictional characters

41. Brazil is playing tomorrow and I’m betting…that Neymar is ready to roll.

40. What are the first 3 words in every Brazilian cookbook? Steal a chicken

#39 – 30. Brazil Jokes

39. Why can’t Brazilian be firemen? They can’t tell the difference between jose and hose b

38. What do you call two Brazilian FireFighting brothers? Hose A and Hose B

37. How would you rate a really ugly Brazilian? 1 out of 7

36. What does a Brazilian do after winning the World Cup? Turns off his Playstation.

35. What do the Brazilian call “The Bachelorette”? Pico de Gallo.

34. What a do a bunch of people in Brazil speak? Portuguese. What does just one Brazilian speak? Portugoose.

33. What is the population of Brazil? I’d say about a Brazilian people or so

32. What do you call a guy thats half Brazilian and half Chinese that wears only one sneaker? Juan Chu

31. So you’ve probably heard the Brazilian variant of COVID is a bit more infectious than what we have here up north. Don’t worry, I hear things are going to clear up a lot down south when they get a Brazilian Vax.

30. Brazil might as well legalize weed. They’re smoking enough trees as it is.

#29 – 20. Brazil Jokes

29. How Much Money Does Brazil make? About a brazilian dollars!

28. A blonde hears on the news that a bridge collapsed and killed a Brazilian. She gasped, “That’s a lot of people!”

27. A Brazilian man in Mexico doesn’t know why the U.S. deported him there. Can you imagine Hispanic?

26. My friend said he wanted to go to Brazil and hump a wild lion. That’s ridiculous. There are no wild lions in Brazil!

25. My wife paid $50 for a Brazilian waxing. She said it was a rip-off.

24. What do you call two Brazilian playing basketball? Juan on Juan.

23. A veterinary surgeon has successfully removed the vocal cords of a green tree frog. He can no longer croak….

22. Why did the Brazilian sign up for Tinder? For a Juan night stand.

21. I can’t listen to brazilian jazz. Maybe a hundred jazz, or a thousand, but brazilian jazz? That’s just way too much jazz.

20. “Denial isn’t just a river in Brazil.” “That’s the Amazon.” “No, I refuse to believe that.”

#19 – 10. Brazil Jokes

19. What do you call a Brazilian Jedi? Obi Juan Kenobi.

18. Never get a Brazilian wax It’s a total rip-off.

17. What’s the difference between a chickpea and a Brazilian nut? I wouldn’t let a chickpea in my mouth.

16. Did you know that Harry Potter sold so many books it is possible to cover all of Brazil with them? They also did it when they were in tree form

15. A blond is watching the news and hears that 2 Brazilian men died from Coronavirus. She cried and asked, “Oh my gosh, how many is a Brazilian?”

14. How many goals did Germany score in the knockout round? A Brazillon.

13. Who is faster? Usain Bolt in the 100m finals or Ryan Lochte running through the airport to catch his flight out of Brazil?

12. Did you hear about the Brazilian train killer? He had loucomotives.

11. What do you call Brazilian food that slowly moves? Inch-iladas.

10. The England team visited an orphanage in Brazil today. “It’s heartbreaking to see their sad little faces with no hope,” said Jose, age 6.

#9 – 1. Brazil Jokes

9. What do you call a Brazilian with a rubber toe? Roberto!

8. What do you call a Brazilian with no car? Joaquin!

7. What do you call a Brazilian jedi apprentice? Pada Juan.

6. Why couldn’t the Brazilian go bow hunting? Because he didn’t haberno.

5. “Mr. President, two Brazilian soldiers were killed yesterday in Iraq.” “Oh my God! How many is a Brazilian?”

4. How does every Brazilian joke start? By looking over your shoulder.

3. Brazil have sent star player Neymar to Thailand to help rescue the young footballers in the cave…they heard they needed someone to teach them how to dive

2. What did the Brazilian say when he had the best time of his life? Taco about a good time.

1. I also like my women like I like my coffee…cheaply imported from Brazil

Ideas for the top 52 Brazil jokes come from the following sources.^[1]jokes4us – brazil joke^[2]upjoke – Brazil joke^[3]upjoke – Brazilian joke