Top 30 Japanese Jokes

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Japan is a country with a long and storied noble history. However, it also is quite funny. With that in mind, check out the top 30 Japanese jokes. 

#30 – 20. Japanese Jokes

30. Q: Why are there never any Japanese bingo players? A:They always disappear after they hear B-29

29. Q: What Japanese drink is made from carrots, cabbage, and broccoli? A: Mitsuya Cider (‘mitsu yasai da’ means ‘three vegetables’)

28. Q: What time was it when Godzilla ate the Japanese Prime Minister? A: Eight P.M.

27. Q: What did the Japanese father tell his daughter? A: You allergic to bees…..Good! Get A’s or C your way out of my house.

26. Q: How many Japanese does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: It doesn’t matter because they’re all to short.

25. Q: What has 2 wings and a halo? A: A Japanese telephone, Wing-wing, halo?

24. Q: What do you call a Japanese woman with one leg? A: Irene

23. Q: What’s a Japanese girl’s favorite holiday? A: “Erection” day.

22. Q: What do you call a Japanese protest? A: a SITUASIAN.

21. Q: Why do Japanese Sumo Wrestlers shave their legs? A: So you can tell them apart from the feminists.

20. Q: If Japanese pop is called Jpop, what is Chinese rapcalled? A: Crap

#19 – 10. Japanese Jokes

19. Q: What do you call a bunch of Asians in a pool? A: Rice Krispies

18. Q: What do Japanese kids eat at snack time? A: Anime crackers.

17. Q: How many Japanese does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: It doesn’t matter because they’re all too short.

16. Q: A Japanese ship sinks, there is only one lifeboat, how many people are saved A: Nine. (The Japanese word for lifeboat is ‘kyuu-mei’, which is another way to say ‘nine people’.)

15. Q: Why are there never any Japanese bingo players? A: They always disappear after they hear B-29

14. Q: What Japanese drink is made from cabbage, carrots, and broccoli? A: Mitsuya Cider (‘mitsu yasai da’ means ‘three vegetables’)

13. Q: What’s a Japanese girl’s favorite holiday? A: “Erection” day

12. Q: Why wasn’t Jesus born in Japan? A: He couldn’t find 3 wise men or a virgin.

11. Q: How do you know if a Japanese gang robbed your house? A: All the rice is gone and 3 hours later they’re still trying to backup out of the driveway.

10. Q: A Japanese ship sinks, there is only one lifeboat,how many people are saved? A: Nine. (The Japanese word for lifeboat is’kyuu-mei’, which is another way to say ‘nine people’.)

#9 – 1. Japanese Jokes

9. Q: What do you call a Japanese protest? A: a SITUASIAN

8. Q: Why do Asian girls have small boobs? A: Because only A’s are acceptable

7. Q: If a pig and a horse had a race, who would win? A: The pig. (Why? ‘ton-katsu da kara’. ‘Ton-katsu’ is ‘pork cutlet’, and ‘katsu’ also means ‘to win’.)

6. Q: How does every Japanese joke start? A: By looking over your shoulder.

5. Q: What do Japanese kids eat at snack time? A: Anime crackers.

4. Q: What time was it when godzilla ate the Japanese prime minister? A: Eight P.M.

3. Q: A pig and a horse had a race. Who won? A: The pig. (Why? ‘ton-katsu da kara’. ‘Ton-katsu’ is ‘pork cutlet’, and ‘katsu’ also means ‘to win’.) A little japanese breed dog bit a man and the owner got the shitzued out of him!

2. Q: Whats the difference between a smart Japanese man and a unicorn? A: Nothing, they’re both fictional characters

1.Q: What do they eat for breakfast in Tokyo? A: Japancakes.

Ideas for the top 30 Japanese jokes were taken from the following sources.^[1]Jokes 4 Us – Japan Jokes^[2]Quick, Funny Jokes! – Japan, Japanese Jokes