Top 48 Brother Jokes

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Brothers are both your closest friends and biggest enemies. With that in mind, check out the top 48 brother jokes.

#48 – 40. Brother Jokes

48. My brother just admitted that he broke my favorite lamp I’m not sure I’ll be able look at him in the same light ever again

47. What did Poseidon say to his brother? Jesus.

46. Parents: Your brother wanna major in chemistry. Me: BrO

45. My brother was addicted to the Hokey Pokey…But luckily he turned himself around.

44. My brother went to jail. He didn’t take it well. Started insulting and attacking everyone and threw his own feces on the walls. I don’t think we’ll play Monopoly with him again.

43. What do you call two Mexican FireFighting brothers? Hose A and Hose B

42. I think the only girl I know that hasn’t said “you’re like a brother to me” is my sister.

41. My brother, who’s a cowboy, always sits on the stove when he visits us. He says that it makes him feel more at home… on the range.

40. My half brother is 6ft 3inches…Just imagine if he was a full brother.

#39 – 30. Brother Jokes

39. Apparently, Neil deGrasse Tyson has a brother, who has a very successful grass-cutting business. Yup. His name is Moe.

38. I asked my brother how his date went. He said he found out she was an anesthesiologist. Talk about a snooze fest.

37. Last year I recorded a video with my brother. Now we have brovid-19

36. My brother and I laugh at how competitive we were as kids. But I laugh more.

35. My brother hated going to jail. He refused to eat or drink anything, spat on everyone and covered the walls with his own feces…We never played monopoly again.

34. “I barely even touched you” #growingupwithbrothers

33. Know what the female equivalent of blood brothers are? Blood blisters.

32. Twin brothers just had a birthday. One turned twenty. The other turned twenty too.

31. What did the German kid say when he pushed his brother off a cliff? “Look, mother, no Hans!”

30. My brother wants to try skydiving so I warned him that…It has so many downfalls.

#29 – 20. Brother Jokes

29. Talking with my brother: “Hey remember when we would see how far we could jump off the staircase?” “That just sounds like leaping off ledges with extra steps”

28. My daughter said her hand hurts when she moves it, her brother said “stop moving it then.” my work here is done.

27. [Pulling brother’s life support plug] *whispers in ear* “This is for that time you cheated at Monopoly.”

26. My brother dug a hole in the ground, filled it with water then designed a moving staircase that was powered by it. That well escalated quickly!

25. What is the name of Satan’s long lost brother? Sacos and Sasin.

24. I finally hooked up with the girl who said, “You’re like a brother to me”. I said, “Well, if you incest”.

23. Wolverine’s mom: If you’re going out take your brother with you. Wolverine: But Mom he’s so weird. Listerine: Nothing weird about fresh breath

22. Why did Sally go to the Lake after her brothers teased her? To fish for compliments.

21. Just read an interesting fact – Bruce Lee had a vegan brother. Broco Lee

20. My footless brother stepped all over a freshly hatched anthill. Guess you could say he’s lack-toes in toddler ants

#19 – 10. Brother Jokes

19. If Mario’s brother died, would he contact him through a Luigi board?

18. Did you know Aaron Burr had a brother who was always falling over? His name was Tim.

17. “Dad, you called me my brother’s name.” I’m sorry  *30 second pause*  little dude.

16. I hear that Legolas from the Lord of the Rings had an older brother, but he died before Legolas was born. His name was Legofirst.

15. I never wanted to believe that my brother was stealing from his job as a road worker but when I got home, all the signs were there

14. I just got a ps5 for my little brother. Best trade I ever made

13. What do you call the wife of an elephant’s mother’s brother? Eleph-aunt

12. I told my kids, “Did you know Albert Einstein had a brother that was an evil scientist who created a monster from body parts and his name was…”…Frank!”

11. My dad asked me to hand out invitations for my brothers surprise birthday party…That’s when I realized he was the favorite twin.

10. My brother lost his left arm and left leg in a terrible auto accident. He is all right, now.

#9 – 1. Brother Jokes

9. My brother and I are on a tight deadline to make Dracula action figures. I have to make every second Count.

8. My brother always takes the stairs, but I prefer taking the elevator. I guess we are raised differently.

7. I told my brother ten jokes to make him laugh…No pun in ten did.

6. My brother just had twins so I invited him to join the group. He is now a Pa Pa

5. What do you call a Lannister girl who can outrun her brothers? A Virgin.

4. My 8 year old brother made this one: How does the fish cross the road? It wears flip FLOPS!

3. Me at family reunion: I’m sick of you being called the cool one brother who once attended a taping of the price is right: it is what it is

2. My brother who works in a tannery has gone missing. We haven’t seen hair nor hide of him.

1. My brother had to quit his job as a weightlifter because he wasn’t strong enough. He handed in his too weak notice yesterday.

Ideas for the top 48 brother jokes come from the following sources.^[1]Buzzfeed – 26 Jokes You Need To See If You Have A Brother^[2]Jokes4Us – Sibling Jokes^[3]punstoppable – Brothers puns