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Top 96 Mark Twain Quotes

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Mark Twain is one of the most famous American authors ever. There are many famous Mark Twain quotes and books. With that in mind, check out the top 96 Mark Twain quotes.

#96 – 90. Mark Twain Quote

96. “Never try to teach a pig to sing, you waste your time, and you annoy the pig”

95. “I can live for two months on a good compliment.”

94. “Kindness is a language which the dead can hear and the blind can see”.

93. “Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.”

92. “Will courage you will dare to risks, have the strength to be compassionate, and the wisdom to be humble. courage is the foundation of integrity.”

91. “Never put off till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.”

90. “Substitute ‘damn’ every time you’re inclined to write ‘very;’ your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.”

#89 – 80. Mark Twain Quotes

89. “A good marriage is the union of the two good forgiveness”

88. “I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.”

87. “I do not fear death, I had been dead for billions and billions of years before i was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.”

86. “I can teach anybody how to get what they want out of life. The problem is that I can’t find anybody who can tell me what they want.”

85. “Life does not consist mainly, or even largely, of facts or happenings. It consist mainly of the storm of thoughts that is forever flowing through one’s head.”

84. “Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.”

83. “A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants is back the minute itbegins to rains.”

82. “′Classic′ – a book which people praise and don’t read.”

81. “In a good bookroom you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in all the books through your skin, without even opening them.”

80. “Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.”

#79 – 70. Mark Twain Quote

79. “Any emotion, if it is sincere, is involuntary.”

78. “I do not fear death. I had been dead for billions and billions of years before I was born, and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience from it.”

77. Don’t part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.

76. “All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.”

75. “A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.”

74. “Continuous improvement is better than delayed perfection.”

73. “Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you would rather have talked.”

72. “Do something every day that you don’t want to do. This is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain.”

71. “Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”

70. “Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.”

#69 – 60. Mark Twain Quote

69. “Wrinkles should merely indicate where the smiles have been.”

68. “The secret of getting ahead is getting started.”

67. “The more I learn about people, the more I like my dog.”

66. “Books are for people who wish they were somewhere else.”

65. “I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn’t know.”

64. “Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter”

63. “It is curious- curious tha physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare.”

62. “Too much of anything is bad, but too much of good whiskey is barely enough”

61. “Don’t part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.”

60. “It is better to deserve honors and not have them than to have them and not deserve them.”

#59 – 50. Mark Twain Quote

59. “A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.”

58. “The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.”

57. “Give every day the chance to become the most beautiful of your life.”

56. “Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.”

55. If you don’t read the newspaper, you’re uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you’re misinformed.

54. “It’s not the size of the dog in the fight, it’s the size of the fight in the dog.”

53. “I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”

52. “We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.”

51. “To get the full value of joy you must have someone to divide it with.”

50. “Giving up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I’ve done it thousands of times.”

#49 – 40. Mark Twain Quote

49. “To succeed in life,  you need two things ignorance and confidence.”

48. “The trouble is not in dying for a friend, but in finding a friend worth dying for.”

47. “The difference between the almost right word and the right word is really a large matter. ’tis the difference between the lightning bug and the lightning.”

46. “A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.”

45. “The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.”

44. “Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn’t.”

43. “Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.”

42. If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.

41. Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear — not absence of fear.

40. “Never argue with stupid people, they will drag you down to their level and then beat you with experience.”

#39 – 30. Mark Twain Quotes

39. “Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear, not absence of fear.”

38. “Life is short, break the rules. Forgive quickly, kiss slowly. Love truly. Laugh uncontrollably and never regret anything that makes you smile.”

37. “Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it.”

36. “The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated.”

35. “You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, burning bushes food falling from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical absurd and primitive stories, and you say that we are the ones that need help.”

34. Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; truth isn’t.

33. “With courage you will dare to take risks, have the strength to be compassionate, and the wisdom to be humble. Courage is the foundation of integrity.”

32. “When all else fails, write what your heart tells you. You can’t depend on your eyes when your imagination is out of focus.”

31. “It is wiser to find out than suppose.”

30. “Why shouldn’t truth be stranger than fiction? Fiction. after all has to make sense.”

#29 – 20. Mark Twain Quote

29. “The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”

28. “A half-truth is the most cowardly of lies.”

27. “If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.”

26. “Out of all the things I have lost, I miss my mind the most.”

25. Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.

24. “I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.”

23. “The worst loneliness is not to be comfortable with yourself”

22. “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So, throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

21. “Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.”

20. “What would men be without women? Scarce, sir…mighty scarce.”

#19 – 10. Mark Twain Quote

19. “The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.”

18. “Now and then we had the hope that if we lived and were good. God would permit us to be pirates.”

17. “Don’t wait. The time will never be just right.”

16. “God created war so that Americans would learn geography.”

15. “Sanity and happiness are an impossible combination.”

14. “The world owes you nothing. It was here first.”

13. “Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.”

12. “Thousands of geniuses live and die undiscovered – either by themselves or by others.”

11. “Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness.”

10. “But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?”

#9 – 1. Mark Twain Quotes

9. “When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years.”

8. “A Christian is a person who wants to give up great things in a real life, for mediocre things is an imaginary one, more importantly, they demand you do the same.”

7. “It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt.”

6. “Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.”

5. “Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.”

4. “Patriotism is supporting your country all the time and your government when it deserve it.”

3. “When a man loves cats, I am his friend and comrade without further introduction”

2. “Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to.”

1.“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect).”

Ideas for the top 96 Mark Twain quotes were taken from the following sources. [1]Quote Ambition – Top 80 Inspiring Mark Twain Quote On Life[2]Quote Ideas – 50 Best Inspiring Mark Twain Quote About Life[3]goodreads – Mark Twain Quote[4]Goalcast – 22 Mark Twain Quote that Could Change the World