Top 47 Martial Arts Jokes

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Martial arts can be practiced for a variety of reasons such as self-defense and competition. However, no matter why you are learning it, it can always teach you something about yourself. With that in mind, check out the top 47 martial arts jokes.

#47 – 40. Martial Arts Jokes

47. I beat a black belt at karate  My next opponent is a red sock

46. What’s a martial artists favorite drink? Punch

45. What is a martial artist’s favorite part of a joke? The punch line

44. What do you call a lawyer who knows karate? A self defense attorney

43. What do you call a sheep that does Karate? Lamb Chop

42. What type of martial arts does a monkey practice? Kong-Fu

41. I saw my old karate instructor in his car yesterday He drove a KKIIIIIAAAAA

40. Why did the cupboard learn karate? For shelf-defense

#39 – 30. Martial Arts Jokes

39. What vegetable knows Kung Fu? Broc-Lee

38. What type of martial arts do British people like? Kara-Tea

37. What do you call a pig that does Karate? Pork Chop

36. What is the favourite drink of a karateka? Punch

35. Do you know what happened to Bruce Lee after he fought Chuck Norris? He became Bruised Lee

34. What is a Ninja’s favorite food after karate class? Smack-aroni and Cheese

33. Have you seen the new karate opera? Critics are calling it sensei-tional

32. Did you hear about the ex-baker who started taking karate classes? After only 2 months of practice he already earned a black belt in tai kwon dough

31. I’m a huge fan of foreign martial arts, so I went to Thailand for an MMA competition Somebody must have given me the directions to a local Star Wars convention instead because all I see are Thai Fighters

30. There are so many forms of martial arts, it’s hard to keep track of Kind of …Kung Fusing

#29 – 20. Martial Arts Jokes

29. What do you call a goat that knows martial arts? Karate Kid

28. My career as a karate instructor finally came to an end The parents found out I wasn’t qualified and just enjoyed kicking children.

27. There was a man who became a karate champion on Christmas day. He decided to go by the name “The Nutcracker”

26. What do you get when you mix a pig and a karate master? A pork chop

25. What happened when the black belt joined the military? The first time he saluted, he knocked himself out.

24. Your karate master is offering you a fruity drink, why should you duck? It’s a fruit punch

23. Knock. Knock. Who’s there? Sensei. Sensei who? I sensei bad joke coming.

22. I’m sick of martial arts I have kung-flu

21. What do you call a red-haired kid who is excellent at karate? The Carroty Kid

20. I came last in my karate competition yesterday I was kicking myself!

#19 – 10. Martial Arts Jokes

19. A karate instructor was arrested after leaving the shop He was charged with chop lifting

18. My wife says it’s time to stop pretending to be the Karate Kid. I had to put my foot down

17. What is the favorite drink of martial artists? Punch

16. I’ve developed my own style of martial arts that involves defenestration. I call it Yeet Kune Do.

15. What did the Karate master say when he took back his nachos from a thief? That’s not- cho-cheese!

14. Knock Knock. Who’s there? Sensei. Sensei who? I sensei bad joke coming

13. It’s not that I love karate  I just hate boards.

12. What martial art do British people like? Kara-Tea

11. When a martial arts practitioner gets hurt…it’s called a ninjury

10. Why did the karate master rob the shoe shop? Just for kicks

#9 – 1. Martial Arts Jokes

9. What do martial arts and matzah have in common? Judo

8. I started a new martial arts that consists only on air waves I call it, Fujitsu

7. What martial arts came from Sweden? Ikea-Do

6. What do you call a bear with martial arts skills? Grizz Lee.

5. What do you call a bear that knows karate? Griz Lee Bear

4. I advise you, don’t mess with me, I know karate, kung fu, judo, tae kwon do, jiu jitsu…..and 28 other dangerous words

3. I decided to teach karate to my neighbors’ kid He was enthusiastic for the first 2 days but then quit before he could finish painting the fences.

2. What martial art comes from Sweden? Ikea-do

1. Did you hear about the karate champion who joined the army? It was pretty bad. The first time he saluted, he almost killed himself !

Ideas for the top 47 martial arts jokes come from the following sources.^[1]blackbeltwiki – List of Martial Arts Joke^[2]halekarateclub – 28 Karate Joke To Keep You Going^[3]upjoke – Martial arts joke^[4]The Karate Blog – 55 Funny Karate Jokes That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud