Top 101 Hipster Jokes

Les Listes is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.

Hipsters liked jokes about hipsters before it was cool to like them. With that in mind, check out the top 101 hipster jokes. 

#101 – 90. Hipster Jokes

101. Who was the first hipster? You’ve probably never heard of him.

100. Q: Why do hipsters love ice? A: Because ice was water before it was cool.

99. Q: What was the hipster doing at the computer? A: Looking in the recycling bin for something retro.

98. Q: Why did the hipster burn his tongue? A: Because he ate his food before it was cool.

97. Hipsters hate rivers. Too mainstream.

96. Q: Why are farmers cooler than Hipsters? A: Farmers can go a day without their Pitchfork

95. If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, a hipster will buy it on vinyl.

94. Knock knock.. who’s there? eh, you probably haven’t heard of me.

93. Hipsters hate rivers. Too mainstream.

92. Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Dude, the light bulb was cooler before it changed.

91. Q: How do you get a hipster to eat a hot dog? A: Put it in a man bun.

90. Q: Why do hipsters love using the subway? A: Because it’s underground.

#89 – 80. Hipster Jokes

89. Q: Who was the First Hipster? A: You’ve probably never heard of him.

88. What happens when a hipster falls? They Tumblr

87. Q: How many hipsters can you get into a phone booth? A: One, any more and it would be too mainstream.

86. Why does the hipster only listen to dead musicians? He knows they’ll always be underground.

85. Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: You wouldn’t know, it’s kind of an obscure number

84. Q: What do you get when you combine a Starbucks and Yoga class? A: I don’t know, but there’s probably a hipster close by.

83. If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, a hipster will buy the soundtrack?

82. How do you know if someone is a true hipster or not?  Wait until they tell you their not, then you know they are.

81. Q: What happens when a Hipster falls? A: They Tumblr

80. Why do hipsters love ice? Because ice was water before it was cool.

#79 – 70. Hipster Jokes

79. If a hipster does something, but doesn’t Instagram it, did it really happen?

78. Q: How many hipsters does it take to flush a toilet? A: You can’t touch that toilet, it’s art.

77. How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram

76. Why did the hipster leave his oceanside mansion? It was too current.

75. Q: What do you get if you cross a hipster with a vampire? A: Count Swagula

74. Q: Why did the hipster stand by the fan? A: He was trying to stay cool.

73. Hipsters wear jackets in the summer, before it’s cool.

72. Q: What kind of cereal do hipsters eat? A: Vape Nuts or Emoji-Os.

71. Why are hipsters so thin? because they have skinny genes.

70. Q: What do hipsters put on their strawberries? A: Beforeit was cool whip.

#69 – 60. Hipster Jokes

69. I’m so hipster, even I’ve never heard of my favorite band.

68. Q: How do you drown a hipster? A: In the mainstream

67. Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: An instagram

66. Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: An instagram

65. Q: Why did the hipster burn his tongue? A: He drank low fat non whip frapp before it was cool.

64. Is there anything hipsters can’t ruin? There is, but you probably haven’t heard of it.

63. Q: Why do hipsters love using the subway? A: Because its underground.

62. Q: Why do hipsters love using the subway? A: Because its underground.

61. Q: What’s a hipster’s favorite profession? A: Mortician. All of his work is 6 feet underground.

60. Q: How do you get a hipster to eat a hot dog? A: Put it in a man bun.

#59 – 50. Hipster Jokes

59. Q: What do you get if you cross a fridge and a hipster playlist? A: Cool music!

58. Why didn’t the hipster go to work?  He had caught the uncommon cold.

57. Q: Why did the hipster burn his tongue? A: He drank low fat non whip frapp before it was cool.

56. Kind of surprised hipsters haven’t started tying their beard’s in man buns yet.

55. Q: What do you get if you cross a fridge and a hipster playlist? A: Cool music!

54. I’m starting a club to capitalize on Hipsters. its 10 dollars not to join.

53. Q: You know what would make America great again?  A: If we kept the Mexicans and deported the hipsters.

52. Why do hipsters only use the microwave? They don’t like conventional ovens.

51. Why shouldn’t you bet on a hipster in a bike race? Because it’s “fixed”

50. Q: How did the wanna-be-hipster die? A: Trying to cross the mainstream!

#49 – 40. Hipster Jokes

49. Q: Why did the hipster leave his oceanside mansion? A: It was too current.

48. If a tree falls in the woods and no one is around to hear it, a hipster will buy it on vinyl.

47. Q: How many hipsters can you get into a phone booth? A: One, any more and it would be too mainstream.

46. Q: What do you call a hipster with a speech impediment? A: Mumblr.

45. Q: What do hipsters eat for breakfast? A: Bronuts and Sticky Man-buns.

44. Q: What do you get when you combine a Starbucks and Yoga class? A: I don’t know, but there’s probably a hipster close by.

43. Q: Why did the hipster burn his tongue? A: Because he ate his food before it was cool.

42. I farted in a room of hipsters and I watched them fight each other over who heard it first.

41. Q: Why do hipsters love ice? A: Because ice was water before it was cool.

40. Hipsters wear jackets in the summer, before it’s cool.

#39 – 30. Hipster Jokes

39. Q: How do you drown a hipster? A: In the mainstream.

38. Q: Why are farmers cooler than Hipsters? A: Farmers can go a day without their Pitchfork

37. Why did the hipster drown? He went ice skating before it was cool.

36. Q: Why do hipsters only use the microwave. A: They don’t like conventional ovens.

35. Q: Why did Hitler hate golf? A: Because he ended up in the bunker.

34. Q: How do you know if Shakira is still cool? A: Ask a Hipster – Hipsters don’t lie!

33. Q: How do you know if Shakira is still cool? A: Hipsters don’t lie.

32. Q: What do you call a hipster with a speech impediment? A: Mumblr

31. Q: Why did the hipster leave his oceanside mansion? A: It was too current.

30. Q: Why do hipsters love using the subway? A: Because itsunderground.

#29 – 20. Hipster Jokes

29. What do you get when you combine a Starbucks and Yoga class? I don’t know, but there’s probably a hipster close by.

28. Why do hipsters love using the subway? Because its underground.

27. Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: You wouldn’t know, it’s kind of an obscure number

26. Q: Why do hipsters love ice? A: Because ice was water before it was cool.

25. Q: What do you get if you cross a hipster with a vampire? A: Count swagula.

24. How do you kill a hipster? Stab it with a Pitchfork

23. Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One to screw it in and the other to wear skinny jeans.

22. Q: Why do hipsters only use the microwave. A: They don’t like conventional ovens.

21. Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: You wouldn’t know, it’s kind of an obscure number.

20. Q: Why did the hipster float down the tributary? A:Because the river was too mainstream.

#19 – 10. Hipster Jokes

19. Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: One to screw it in and the other to wear skinny jeans.

18. Q: How do you kill a hipster? A: Stab it with a Pitchfork

17. Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: An instagram.

16. Q: Why did the hipster burn his tongue? A: Because he ate his food before it was cool

15. Why Did The Hipster Burn His Tongue? He ate his food before it was cool. 

14. Why did the hipster burn his tongue? Because he drank his coffee before it was cool.

13. Q: How many hipsters can you get into a phone booth? A: One, any more and it would be too mainstream.

12. Q: Why are farmers cooler than Hipsters? A: Farmers can go a day without their Pitchfork

11. Q: What do you get if you cross a fridge and a hipster playlist? A: Cool music!

10. Q: How do you drown a hipster? A: In the mainstream.

#9 – 1. Hipster Jokes

9. Q: What do you call a shy, soft-spoken hipster? A: mumblr

8. How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? You wouldn’t know, it’s kind of an obscure number.

7. Q: How many hipsters can you get into a phone booth? A: One, any more and it would be too mainstream.

6. What’s the only candy a hipster will eat? A Kik kat bar.

5. Q: Why did the hipster leave his oceanside mansion? A: It was too current.

4. How do you drown a hipster? In the mainstream.

3. Q: Why did the hipster float down the tributary? A: Because the river was too mainstream.

2. Q: Why are all the ugly chicks hipsters? A: Because beauty is just too Mainstream!

1.Two hipsters walk into a bar. The first one did it before it was cool, and the second one did it ironically.

Ideas for the top 101 hipster jokes were taken from the following sources.^[1]Dumb.com – Hipster Joke^[2]Super Jokes – Hipster Joke^[3]Quick, Funny Jokes! – Hipster Joke^[4]UniJokes – The best hipster joke^[5]Jokes 4 Us – Hipster Joke