Top 84 Burrito Jokes

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Burritos are one of the greatest foods ever invented. You can stuff a bunch of food in a tortilla and take it with you. With that in mind, check out the top 84 burrito jokes.

#84 – 80. Burrito Jokes

84. The cute burrito blushed with guac-wardness when I complimented her.

83. Don’t give a hard time to poorly constructed burritos. I think they get a bad wrap.

82. How do you turn a regular burrito into a breakfast burrito? Wake up with it still in your hand.

81. Me: Shredded beef instead of ground beef? That’s pretty rare. Dad: No, I think it’s well-done

80. A quesadilla’s favorite ice cream is a Mo-cheese.

#79 – 70. Burrito Jokes

79. What do you say when you finish eating a burrito? “And it’s a wrap!”

78. Why can’t breakfast burritos pull an all-nighter? It’s because they get eggs-hausted.

77. What did the burrito topping with a good workflow say? I’m on a roll!

76. My burrito friend, who lived next door, passed away last night. I still can’t wrap my head around it.

75. I love burritos. They guac-cupy a special place in my heart.

74. I really like burritos. I could taco about them all day.

73. When the chipotle died, we thought it’s best to burr-it-off in the ocean.

72. What do you call selfish bacteria in a chipotle burrito? M-E.coli.

71. Burritos just love to have avoca-dough toasts for breakfast.

70. Reuniting a child with its mother warms my heart. That’s why I add chicken to my cheese and egg stuffed burrito.

#69 – 60. Burrito Jokes

69. “Lettuce be friends!” said the tortilla to the beans.

68. What do call a cat in a blanket? A purrrrito.

67. I wonder what burritos do during the summer. Perhaps they go skinny dip-ping in the sea.

66. Did you hear about the guy who forgot to put cheese on his burrito? How dairy

65. This is a taco and burrito conversation. Nachos.

64. What do burritos ask when they meet after a long time? “Hey, how have you bean?”

63. How many Mexicans does it take to eat the worlds largest burrito? Just Juan.

62. What do you call a baby donkey? A burrito.

61. Why is your mom like a burrito? Because she’s full of fat and only worth a buck.

60. Today I wrote a song about a burrito actually, it was more of a wrap

#59 – 50. Burrito Jokes

59. I like to put grilled chicken in my egg and cheese stuffed breakfast burrito…Nothing warms my heart and stomach more than reuniting a mother and child.

58. I hear that the detective has found one lost jar of cheese dip in the refrigerator. He just cracked a cold queso-pen.

57. I set my burrito down on the window sill and went to get a drink. When I came back, there was a long line of ants running into my food!! I hate sill ant row!

56. Did you hear about the wedding song written while eating a cheesy beef burrito? It’s called Taco Bell’s canon.

55. My girlfriend was just like a spicy burrito. It hurt when she left me

54. What is a burrito’s favorite music? Beets.

53. I can never trust my burrito friend with secrets. She’ll just spill the beans!

52. My waiter asked, “Would you want beef, sour cream, and salsa in your burrito?” “That’s a loaded question!” I replied.

51. I wish to tell you the story about the man who stole cheese from my fridge. K, so here it goes…

50. What do penguins like to eat? Brrrrrrrrritos.

#49 – 40. Burrito Jokes

49. Last night, I had one of those Chinese burritos. Gosh, they weigh almost won-ton!

48. How do you inter a burrito? Sour cremation.

47. My friend was in the kitchen, and he knocked over a pan of hot queso on his feet. Guess he had Tosti-toes.

46. What do ducks like in their burrito? Quack-amole.

45. When I asked my Mexican friend what she does in ques-o’ an emergency, she said, “I pray to cheese-us!”

44. Just traded my girlfriend for a bean burrito. Food for thot.

43. When do they smother a burrito in cheese? In best queso scenario.

42. Why did the man climb onto the roof of Chipotle? Because the manager said the burrito is on the house.

41. I wanted to make a joke about burritos. But I couldn’t wrap it up.

40. What do you call an ice-cold burrito? A burrr-ito.

#39 – 30. Burrito Jokes

39. Yesterday, I was carrying a jar of salsa to the sea beach. So my friend asked what I was doing. I said I’m going to take a dip in the ocean.

38. Two burritos are in the microwave and one says “Wow it’s hot in here.” And the other one said “Oh my gosh a talking burrito!”

37. What’s another name for a frozen burrito? A Burrrrito.

36. What do Mexican prisons serve the inmates who are to be hanged? Pico de gallo-ws.

35. What happens when a hooker eats a bean burrito? Prostitoots!

34. How did the Taco Bell manager motivate his employees? He said, “Cheese the day!”

33. Did you hear the new song about a burrito? It’s more of a rap.

32. What did one burrito say to the other on the dance floor? “Let’s salsa together!”

31. What boy band did a commercial for Taco Bell? Juan Direction.

30. What kind of beans are in God’s burrito? Holy Frijoles!

#29 – 20. Burrito Jokes

29. What does a burrito say when it finishes doing something? That’s a wrap.

28. My friend asked me why their burrito tasted weird. I spilled the beans.

27. How much does a Chinese burrito weigh? Won Ton

26. Chipotle has a Miley Cyrus burrito on it’s menu now! I don’t know what it’s like going in, but I bet it’s coming out like a wreaking ball.

25. What is Gargamel’s favorite kind of burrito? Smurf and Turf.

24. Who doesn’t like one delicious burrito coated in cheesy and spicy queso sauce? We’re sure that our menu of hilarious queso puns will make you crave a wrap right away!

23. What do you call a cold burrito? A burrrr-ito!

22. Why are burritos so conservative? It’s because they are not open like tacos.

21. My college life is like a burrito. It always feels like everything is going to fall apart!

20. A burrito made from paper…would be tearable.

#19 – 10. Burrito Jokes

19. Whenever burritos are sad, they listen to Bohemian wrap-sody.

18. I saw the image of Jesus on my burrito and instead of taking a picture, I just ate it. A few hours later—- Holy shit!

17. Quarantine isn’t going well for Mr Burrito so far. But for him, it’s just the tip of the iceberg, and the worst is yet to come.

16. Why can’t you trust burritos? They tend to spill the beans.

15. Why was the burrito fed up with his fillings? It’s because they wouldn’t Romaine calm.

14. I ate 3 Burritos today The consequences were gastronomical

13. What special ingredient do cannibals put in their burritos? People de gallo

12. My last girlfriend was a lot like a microwave burrito. Smoking hot on the outside Ice cold on the inside

11. What is Rowan Atkinson’s favorite burrito filling? Beans, of course!

10. Where are the best burritos served? In the gulp of Mexico.

#9 –  1. Burrito Jokes

9. What did the happy burrito say to the sad burrito? “Take it cheesy, man!”

8. I tried a new asian burrito recently, but the green onions kept falling out. Curse those wrap-scallions!

7. What goes in a neato burrito? Cool beans.

6. I wrote a hip new song about burritos…Actually it’s more of a wrap.

5. Quesadillas are a big hit at charity dinners because everybody chips in.

4. I was talking to my dad about how delicious burritos and fajitas were and how there was just something about them. He agreed saying it was the taste of the wraps that held it all together.

3. What’s smaller than a pico de gallo? A femto de gallo.

2. What did the burrito say when asked if it wanted brown white or white rice? It said, “I’m not a rice-ist.”

1. “Bean-ough is bean-ough!” cried the burrito when he got very angry.

Ideas for the top 84 burrito jokes come from the following sources.^[1]upjoke – burrito joke^[2]Joke4us – burrito joke^[3]kidadl – 30+ Burrito Puns And Jokes That Will Give You A Serious ‘Queso’ The Giggles^[4]punstoppable – burrito puns